Many of these resources come from ARMS, an organization I highly recommend. Their free HER JOURNEY classes were essential to my healing, even when I was still in an abusive relationship. But there are some additional resources from other places, as well.
I want to note here that the abuse is a PATTERN of power and control used to manipulate another person. I say this because as you review the following you may wonder, “am I an abuser? Sometimes I do some of those things on the Types of Abuse chart!” We all DO use controlling behaviors at times and if God is talking to you about working on that, please do. But unless you are using those controlling behaviors consistently, in order to control another person or the outcome of a situation, you are not likely an abuser.
FOR LEADERS, PASTORS, COUNSELORS
Abuse Information Packet for Leaders and Pastors
Why We Never Recommend Couple’s Counseling in Cases of Abuse
Article: The Church’s Response to Abuse
Book: On The Frontlines of Abuse: Strategies for the Faith Community by Stacey Womack
Book: We Too: How the Church Can Respond Redemptively to the Sexual Abuse Crisis by Mary DeMuth
Book: A Cry for Justice: How the Evil of Domestic Abuse Hides in Your Church by Jeff Crippen and Anna Wood
Book: Setting the Captives Free: A Christian Theology for Domestic Violence by Ron Clark
FOR THOSE WONDERING IF YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP
15 Early Warning Signs of Abuse (helpful for teens who are dating, but also for adults!)
Types of Abuse (you might be surprised!)
FOR THOSE WHO KNOW OR SUSPECT THEY ARE IN ABUSE
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED! Good Boundaries and Goodbyes by Lysa TerKeurst
Book: Why Does He DO That? By Lundy Bancroft
Book: The Emotionally Destructive Relationship: Seeing It, Stopping It, Surviving It by Leslie Vernick
Book: The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to recognize it and how to respond by Patricia Evans
Highly recommend the following programs for women, even if you are not and especially if you are not leaving your abusive situation:
ARMS, Free Her Journey Classes
Flying Free with Natalie Hoffman
The Conquer Program with Leslie Vernick
NOTE: Celebrate Recovery and Mending the Soul both have sections in their program intended for abuse survivors but I have not personnally taken those programs.
If you are a man seeking to heal from abuse, I highly recommend the following counselor who also offers virtual services. Also, consider contacting your local domestic abuse resource for resources for men or those who identify using a fluid gender.
Bonnie Ronstrom, Willow Life Coaching (specializes in narcissistic abuse; offers virtual services), Email
FOR THOSE WANTING TO HELP SOMEONE ELSE
Article: How to Help a Survivor
Book: Helping Her Get Free, by Susan Brewster
Note: The links for the books above are an affiliate links through Amazon.